Here’s how we feel about anal sex: you either love it, or you’re wrong.
Anal sex is the great divide for men and women. Usually, men want to try and women do not. If you do try it, then you either love it or hate it. If you hate it, you may never try it again and that is a shame because maybe the partner you tried it with had no clue what they were doing and decided to just go in without warning.
We’re not scientists but we think, for most men, anal sex sounds exciting, just the thought of penetrating a tight entry and getting your penis enveloped by something other than a mouth, a hand or a vagina sounds awesome. In heterosexual couples, more often than not it’s the men who want to do anal sex more than the women because it’s a whole new way to explore sex, isn’t it? Whereas the women may not even want to try it because they think it’s too invasive or unnatural. Here’s the thing, if you and your partner are in a loving and open minded sexual relationship, anal should be something you explore together.
And if you’ve never been a back door lover before, let us give you some tips on how to make it a pleasurable experience for the receiver. After this first time, your receiving partner will want you to do it more often.
The joke of “exit only” makes absolute sense when it comes to anal play. Inserting an object into one’s anus doesn’t come naturally but it can be done if you are not stressed out or freaking out. You need to relax your body and your mind. Anal sex is not taboo and doesn’t make you a freak especially in this day and age. Anal sex is pleasurable fun. Trust us. Before you put anything inside, get your partner in a good position: the best position for anal sex is actually the doggy style. So get your partner on their knees, facing away from you, their face down and their ass up in the air. Spread those legs so you can view the little opening or otherwise known as “the star” clearly.
Anal sex foreplay is necessary just as much as vaginal foreplay. It helps entry into the body easy. Rimming should be your starter. You’ll need to tap “the star” gently with your tongue like ringing a door bell. Then you switch between flicking the entry with the tip of your tongue and licking it with the flat part of your tongue to get it all wet and lathered. And then you can begin to stick your tongue inside really gently. You’ll see your partner squirm at the beginning and then relax as you keep going.
Just because you’ve wet and lathered your partner with your tongue doesn’t mean they’re ready yet, so grab the lube and get ready for insertion. Use just one finger first; you can even use a gloved finger for smoother penetration. We cannot stress how much using lube is always a good idea because it helps the anus stay wet longer and cushions the inside of the rectum as well. Once it’s nice and soaking wet, insert one finger inside slowly. Stroke the inside and move your finger tip in a circular motion slowly. Alternate between your finger and your tongue so it becomes a mix of sensations. Take your time and do it slowly.
As you continue this method, your partner will be more and more relaxed and will open up to more of you. So while you play with the anus, use your other hand to stroke her clit or his shaft to make the sensation even more unbearably erotic. Angle the finger in the anus towards the tailbone. If your partner’s ready, insert another finger inside and stroke with slow movements. As the sensations of pleasure get more and more heightened, your partner will be more relaxed and eager for the main event.
Slide your fingers out slowly, in the same pace as you were stroking inside the anus and then slowly slide the head of your penis inside your partner’s anus. But make sure it goes in at the same pace as your fingers did before. If your partner is relaxed and well lubed up, you’ll see that your erect penis will go all the way in up until your balls. Now that you’re in, move at a slow pace at first and then increase the speed and switch between the speeds for more pleasure. You will both be moaning with ultimate joy and pleasure.
Mix things up occasionally with some dirty talk while you’re doing it from behind. A little bit of hair pulling can sometimes go a long way, albeit gently unless they say otherwise. Just make sure your partner is on the same page as you before you do any kinky anal play session. Consent and communication is always key.